Travel

Welcome to my home

My place of peace and quiet, Kerala.

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The four legged figure that looks like the monster from Stranger Things is actually part of a fishing net

Wait, that’s just a picture of the sky. Doesn’t matter if it was taken in Kerala or Egypt! The introvert in me feels at ease in this environment. How I wish vacations lasted a lifetime!

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Inspiration to write

You know when’s the best time to write? When you’re drunk and you don’t care about spelling, well, unless autocorrect is tuned on. Creativity just flows like molten lava. Also, it really helps if your dog died. Then you get that extra boost/pressure to write. I call it depressure. Get it? depression+pressure? Anyway, I think I’ll go back to staring at the wall now. Oh almost forgot! I climbed a hill last weekend. Here’s a picture.

 

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Kolakham, West Bengal

 

Have a good weekend!

Into the wilderness I go

The reason why I used “wilderness” in the title is not because I trekked through a forest but because I trekked through a forest accompanied by three other human beings, which I normally don’t do. The super-introvert in me could never do such a thing but I did it just to see what it would be like and here’s what I’ve learned.

I’ve heard people say ,”you have to travel with people to really get to know them”. I agree with this. However I really think that you need to get to know people if you really need to get to know them. There’s no easy way to do it. So when I went trekking with a friend, her friend and a local, I learned the real reason why we humans are still classified as “animals” rather than something upper-class like “the engineers” or “centurions” 🙂 . 

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Floating market

Being the adventurous go-getter that I am, I paid a visit to the “floating market” on Sunday. The idea of the floating market is simple. Basically, you pay extra to buy groceries from boats. It kind of makes sense. There’s no entry fee. So you get to enjoy the sights for free, if you want to.

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The Floating Market, Kolkata

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My sole purpose of visiting the market was to chill, like this guy.

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Museum of metal wonders

I went to an Archiological Museum. Did I spell that right? Archeology-cal? Archaeoloji. Ar…Ar… Anglican. Anyway… this museum had some unusual stuff in it. I reached the museum quite late. It was about to close. So, a security guard was assigned to guide/nag me through the entire museum. As you all know, I take my museum visits very seriously. So I explicitly stated that the guard maintain a distance of exactly three metres away from me at all times. Why ‘three’ you ask? Well, that’s none of your business. As soon as the receptionist understood that I had difficulty speaking Bengali, she began to shoot questions in English. “Are you South Indian? Where do you stay here? What did you have for dinner yesterday? What’s your blood type?”. You know…the usual stuff. I mean, she was very attractive. That’s probably why I panicked. After a short, uncomfortable conversation, I began the tour with my personal bodyguard.

There were extremely old paintings and pottery(7-14 century). Just as I was about to finish viewing the ground floor, motherfucker(guard) started to blow a damn whistle(probably to ask me to leave). Another guard heard this whistle and started to blow his own whistle. Within a few seconds, the whole fucking museum was whistling. I could see birds fly away from the roof. Motherfuckers were disturbing the wildlife.

As soon I got to the first floor, I knew it was a different scene. You see, there were these sculptures made of metal, kept in glass housings. They were sculpted in the 9th century. I hadn’t seen anything like it before. Figures sculpted with unimaginable level of detail and yet so tiny and realistic. That was not the impressive part. The figures were not of people or animals, rather it looked like something that was taken straight out of a Stephen King movie. There was a figure with an elephant’s head and a slim guy’s body(It had nothing to do with religion). It was holding a walking stick. It had a hunchback. It looked like it was dying. Then there were snakes, dragons and warriors that looked like trees, stuff that I have never seen or could have imagined. I was awestruck.

How could somebody think of that? How wild does ones imagination have to be to make something like that? Where did he get the idea from? Did an alien put it in his mind? Did he dream of it in his sleep? Did his day-to-day life affect the design of the sculpture in any way? Did his family approve of him spending so much time making figures that made no sense to common people? What was going on in his mind when he made it? How was he able to put an ‘idea’ into a sculpture? Does the sculpture mean something? So many questions.

I don’t have any pictures of the metal wonders because pictures were prohibited inside the museum. And I can respect that. All I have is a picture of a tree, from the museum’s garden.

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The metal wonders will always live inside my head. I do not need pictures of them.

On an unrelated note, I got a keyboard. Today is Day 4 with new keyboard.

Side note: I do not know how to play the keyboard.

Visit to the eye doctor

Had to go see the eye doctor today because I sprayed lead in my eye. Life is a mystery, guys. It just keeps getting stranger and stranger. Incase you didn’t know, I am a total social recluse who is working on improving myself. So every opportunity I get to socialise, I force myself to go for it. So I did the most logical thing and hit on two junior doctors at the hospital. Lets just say I got ‘special’ attention because of that. The doctor was really nice. After staring into my soul for a few minutes, she concluded that I had an infection. 

Now that I have disgraced myself, lets move on to the fun part of the story, the part where I make friends. After seeing the doctor I decided to explore that part of the city(this whole incident took place at Salt Lake, Kolkata). Now, I don’t often make friends during my travels because, you know, people are terrifying. But this time, I met some jovial characters that I couldn’t resist making friends with. They were so chill that they didn’t mind me taking pictures of them. In fact, they were happy to hear that I would be writing about them on my blog. Without further ado, here they are.

 

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The “whoa there slow down” lion

 

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The Grasshoppers

The “whoa there slow down” lion is the golden guardian of the roads. He is a funny guy who shouts funny things like, “If you are in a hurry, drive slower”, “your children would rather see you come home late than see you arrive in a casket”, “sex can wait, spinal cord surgeries cannot”. He was sad to say that out of all the defaulters, Lions club members were the worst. We took a selfie too but I can’t show that here due to legal reasons. Onto the next gang, the merry Grasshoppers. The Grasshoppers are a funk/jazz fusion band. They were on tour. It surprised me to see that they didn’t have a drummer. No offence, they sounded great without one. They explained how the drummer had problems with drug abuse. They said he was particularly fond of something called “grass”, which was pretty ironic because all of them seemed to be made out of … you know… grass.

I need help.