Do you know what it feels like to sit at home all alone while the rest of the world is outside having fun? It feels surprisingly good! I should do this more often. Only problem is that I have begun to talk to the computer. Not to Cortana or Siri. Just to the screen.
I should stop using overly dramatic post titles.
Adaptive biological reprogramming, a.k.a. “evolution”(I made that up) gave us the power to think. No one asked for it. It was gifted to us by ourselves. Despite wielding the awesome power of thought, we still do not know where we come from. It shows how complex nature really is. Pictures of Earth taken from outer space have shown us how insignificant we are in the awesomeness that is the universe. The time frame of our very existence shows us how irrelevant we are in the history of Earth itself. It makes you wonder. What’s the point of all this anger, envy and hate? When the camera zooms out and shows the Earth shrink into nothing but a pale blue dot, you suddenly realize that we are but one big family. In the process, we also learn another surprising truth: WE ARE NOT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE. Literally!
The fact that we have begun to understand our place in the universe leads me to believe that we might not be that dumb after all! We may not be “special” but we are participants of a great cosmic journey. In the words of Carl Sagan, “We are all made of ‘star stuff’ “. The ingredients that make up the stars are the very same ones found in our body. We are part of the universe. I think that is super cool. We are not perfect. We find cures for disease yet fail to realize that we are the cause of many of them. But we are curious wanderers. We sent our kind into space. We reverse engineered from the present and found clues that lead back to the beginning of the unverse a.k.a wait for it… The Big Bang! We study our own behaviour! We help each other. We do not need a “meaning” for life, we create it for ourselves. Through the universe, we realize that it is not always about “me” but it is about “us”. I think we are awesome. Hi five yourself.
Everyone knows musical interests are subjective. Why then, do some people beleive that certain genres of music is garbage? There is also a tendency to think less of people who listen to certain genres of music. Does the type of music you listen to say anything about the type of person you are? I really don’t know. What I do know is that there is no such thing as BAD MUSIC.
A few years ago a friend of mine made me listen to a song that she liked. At the time I was trying to win her over so I pretended to listen carefully. I chuckled and said that her taste in music was a little weird. And that was the end of it. This so called “song” that she made me listen to was basically static noise with some kind of a beat laid in between. It was the “uh oh” moment for me. I could not understand how it could be called music.
I realized later in life that this was a major flaw in me. If I didn’t understand something, I was automatically inclined to dislike it. I came to realize this flaw in me while learning to play drums. I used to wonder how amazing rock drummers would end up playing jazz as they grew older. I was ignorant at the time(much more now). I did not understand jazz and obviously disliked it. I’ll be honest. I thought it was gay(which is another problem altogether that I will have to deal with later. One problem at a time). As I got better at playing, I slowly began to appreciate Jazz drumming. I still don’t like to listen to Jazz but I “understand” it now.
I think that in order to understand and appreciate the beauty in some things, you have to reach a certain point of intellectual maturity and understanding of the subject. Same goes with modern art. I used to wonder why the fuck are these people staring at spilt ink on a piece of paper when there is so much more going on in this world? Why waste time like this? Little did I realize that those papers of split ink were speaking to the artists. It was moving them emotionally. Almost like a new method of communication that came from another dimension. That’s the magic of art. There are so many ways to look at it. Many scientists are excited to send artists into space to show them the vast magnificence of the universe. It will be super exciting to see what they will come up with after experiencing the deep unknown.
So there is no bad music. I feel like music has an uncanny ability to invoke particular emotional responses. Its just that every individual resonates to different styles of music. Its sad that some of them are ashamed to reveal their musical interests and have to keep it a secret for fear of not being accepted by society. Don’t get me wrong. “Call me maybe” might not be a scientific marvel but it is entertaining to some and it is noise to others. If you are one of the people who dislike it, just accept the fact that you don’t get it and move on.
What do we want?
We want faster phones, scarier horror movies, underwater restaurants, everlasting bacon, science-based religions, edible flight food, educated politicians, non-addictive drugs, human libraries, three-parent babies, self lacing shoes and of course, pocket pussies. We want to talk to cellphones when we feel lonely. We want to learn to play the piano in one day. We want to wear computers. We want to simulate roller-coaster rides. We want everything right now.
I used to wonder what’s the point of these endless desires. But I kind of get it now. This is how we evolve. I think it is this unstoppable want for new and better things that makes us progress in life. It is what makes us inventors and travellers.
However, things can get confusing along the way.
Goddammit Dolby. What if we get bored of this too?.
I’ve been thinking about what we want vs what we need. Its funny that most of us have a clear idea of what we want but have no clue about what we need. We don’t even know what we need until it is invented by someone else. Some good examples:
Having said that here are some things that I know for sure that I don’t need:
News in 100 words or less
“New” Jumanji movie. I hope they don’t ruin a great movie
“Speak your mind man”, said my boss after discussing my salary. “Dude, if I spoke my mind you would need therapy to get your normal life back”.
Its not just him. Its everyone. Family, friends, strangers. “Speak up. Let it out”. I actually do not have any fear of speaking. It is what I say that I am afraid of. All of these people who say “Speak up. Its ok. You can tell me anything” will just run away if I start talking because I am a real person. I don’t sugar coat things. I say things as they are.
However, I also tend to say a lot of random nonsense that I consider to be “jokes”. These have some sort of a magical property of repelling people away instantly. Its quite useful sometimes.
I am extremely lucky to have a handful of friends with whom I can “speak my mind”. But fuckin “life” comes in there too and fucks it up for everybody. I wish I could live with my friends for ever. No, there’s nothing gay about it. Hell, we don’t even live in the same country anymore.
I’ve never had this trouble until I reached high school. Because until then, my mouth did not have a filter. I used to speak my mind. It was also during this time that I had friends. Many friends. Aha! Eureka!
I was the kid who always wanted to be the “good guy” (I always chose to play as counter-terrorists in Counterstrike even though there were “rumours” that the terrorists were more powerful. Those were weird times). My heroes were Optimus Prime and Swat Kats.
However, there is something admirable about certain movie villains. So admirable that they almost make it look like the makers of the movie want you to “like” the villain more than the hero. Its like, the movies wouldn’t be the same without these villains. The kind of movies that I am talking about are
The Dark Knight
So what’s wrong with Split? We have a dude who goes around kidnapping girls, makes them take off their clothes and finally eats them. Seems like a pretty good role model to me! Obviously this guy is psychotic and needs to be stopped but despite his mental problems, he has unbelievably good discipline! And most importantly, he has good taste in music. Damn those moves were killer(no pun intended).
Jake Gyllenhaal’s character in Night Crawler inspired me. That guy is as creative as Casey Neistat! He’s the kind of guy you would want to be part of your start-up company. He’s got the ideas, plans and most importantly, the ability to do some kickass talking.
I could go on and on about these villains. Obviously, they are all horrible, fucked-up people who deserve to be stopped. However I found some interesting qualities in all of them. For example, all of them have such determination that makes them almost unstoppable. I admire their drive. They are all “perfectionists” and they are really good at what they do.
One last thing about Split:
Everyone’s thinking it. I am just putting it out there. That “Beast” thing was just bullshit.
I am now at a point in my life where I have completely lost the ability to socialize. Yes, its 100% gone. I did it! Woo hoo! Feels great. I feel like I deserve a medal or something. Or a hug. I prefer the hug over the medal actually.
I tried. I gave it my best. How can you conquer something that deep down you know you don’t want? I have begun to really really like not talking to people. I am very happy by myself. Ha ha. But it worries me because I know that’s not good.