15 years ago one Friday evening I realised that I’m addicted to cake. I came home from school, opened the fridge and to my surprise, there was a giant, round pineapple cake just sitting there as if the universe had sent it to me. Back then, my interest in eating cakes was no greater than prof. Stephen Hawking’s interest in watching the Kardashians. I would try one small piece out of curiosity and regret it immediately. But times change, people change (Not my boss though. That motherfucker takes the Lady Gaga song, ‘born this way’ waaaay too seriously).
One slice and that was it. I was hooked. From that day on, I ate one slice everyday after dinner. I fell into an endless spiral of depression after I had the last slice. My mom thought I was losing my mind. I was underweight at the time. I tried a different cake but it just wasn’t the same. But soon I forgot about cake. Fast forward a few years. Sister comes home one day with something called a ‘Mousse cake’. It was like instinct. After locking my sibling in the kitchen I went to a corner of the house and ate the whole thing.
I lost my train of thought. How do I end this? How about a neat rhyme from the 90’s?