social life | Random Thought Beam

I had a very sheltered upbringing, because my parents felt they fucked up with their first child. I remember, as a kid, I was open, expressive and honest. I knew I was weird. I never hid it. I knew people liked me being weird. I remember once, an older cousin commanded me to bring him a glass of water. So I peed in a cup and…you get the idea. I am not proud of it but, it’s a fun story.

Later on, all that changed. I grew quiet. I built an armour around me and I installed a filter on my mouth. I still have remnants of my old self though. Sometimes I’ll feel the urge to strike up a conversation with a random stranger when I’m drunk. The conversation goes really well until the alcohol wears off.

So now, I’m trying to release the Kraken; I am trying to bring back my old self. Turns out, it’s not that easy when you are 27 years old. People get offended very quickly. I can’t stroke a guy’s beard and tell him it “feels” good. I can’t stare into a girl’s eyes and tell her it reminds me of my dead dog. So I’ve toned down the approach. I’m trying out this new method, where I slowly reveal my weirdness and see if it plays out well. Hope I don’t get fired.

Just like any other day I was sitting in my office planning how to deploy artillery around the campus when I heard the boss say something. My brain could not process what was coming out of its mouth. It kept making a weird noise. It sounded like “Party” aka nightmare. “We are having a party at my place tomorrow. I would like you to come” For some reason my immediate answer was “why?”. But what I really wanted to ask was “why should I come? You don’t own me. Why do you always refer to yourself as ‘we’? Are you a legion or something?”.

Long story short, what should have been a perfect evening with my drums, Rick, Morty and Mindhunter is now ruined because I have to talk to “people” instead. Thanks a lot life! I don’t think it’ll be that bad though. Unless a whole group of people try to corner me and force me to talk. I resort to arson in those situations. Which is highly unlikely given my celebrity status in the office.