Corona Virus

Don’t skim through the news

So, today’s paper reads

“All it took

was a

microscopic organism

to make us

more human”

Which is a very thoughtful thing to say, but the problem with reading news online is that when you scroll, letters take on a life of their own.

“All it took

was a


to make 

more humans”

Which again, is a very thoughtful thing to say, though it doesn’t make any sense. But then, I’m sleep deprived. So I get creative with it.

“All it took

was a


to make us

more orgasm”

Impact assessment

So I’m going to do a brief on how the Corona has affected my life. Long story short, it hasn’t, not much. No handshakes? Social distancing? That’s my day-to-day. Though not N95 grade, I’ve been using masks ever since I started getting respiratory problems since last December. I was basically ready to fight this thing head-on from day one. The only difference now is, I get to wear the mask indoors, I feel no shame in asking people not to touch me, and I sanitize the fuck out of my hands. In a way, it has empowered me of sorts.
But it has affected my life in other ways. My mid-week nights at the cinema, and skywatching on the weekends have come to a halt. No more gym, pizza and jamming. Now it’s just me sitting at home thinking about things. Things like, how did guys like Adam Sandler deal with rejection? Will the Corona vaccine have to pass the monkey-test before it reaches hospitals? How long will that take? How many monkeys will live/die the rest of their life with trauma? What if a more violent disease emerges from more toxic environments, like the meeting room at my office?
I see all the suffering on the news, and the paper, and just by word of mouth. It makes me sad that all these people are now left with no option but to ‘deal with it’. That’s ‘just the way life is’ for them, at least for now. What will it take for us to be ‘prepared’? What will it take for us to care for others?

The Corona text

It starts like this…
Please stop the spread of misinformation. Recent posts regarding the Corona Virus, circulating on social media are all baseless. I am the real God.

Figures of Corona cases reported from around the world vs figures of recoveries, comparative figures of deaths caused by other illnesses, number of rape scenes in Game of Thrones, (all data fact-checked by Bart Simpson).

So as you can see, it is not the time to panic, but to be wise, and help others.

Extrapolated figures of what could happen if the Corona Virus were allowed to spread unchecked (obtained from highly reputed sources including the building blocks owned by Maggie Simpson. I miss Maggie. She’s such a cutie).

So, think before you waste a face mask or hand sanitizer. Try to work from home. Question your sexuality.

Courtesy, BBC