Too close

Ever been to a barber shop, and the barber tries to dry hump your leg? That’s a barber who doesn’t give a fuck about anything. This is what happened to me today. I sit down, and he just climbs on top of my knee like a school kid on a see-saw, and starts riding it. Not even fazed by the fact that this is borderline sexual assault, he carried away, until I had to literally wiggle him off. So I sat on that chair, deep in thought about who would win in a fist fight. I just like imagining things. I got to hand it to him though, what he lacks in respecting personal space, he makes up for in skill. This man is an artist with scissors. He doesn’t cut, he glides over the hair. Precision movements, guaranteed to never make a scratch on your body. I felt like a work of art, after all of it was over.

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