It’s too late

We have all seen this horrible sight at some point in our lives. That unholy discharge at the butt of the battery. Some of you might have questions. What happened here? What went wrong? Why is Panasonic fucking me in the ass like this? Well, the short answer is: I left it in too long (that’s what she… never mind). Now, how long is too long? Depends. How long has it been since the clock stopped ticking? A week? A month? We change batteries only after the clock stops ticking. Why? Because there’s no warning. Some clocks stop right away, while others show signs of slowing down. Wait a minute… if they slowed down, we would lose track of time. So we want them to stop. Now, we could introduce a feature where the clock announced it’s own imminent demise, but that would be too depressing wouldn’t it? How many times can you listen to a clock’s death toll while eating lunch at the dinner table? So, no sound. Let the clock die in peace, before a new one is born. but wait, we still have the problem of leaking batteries. Well, what if there existed a perfect world where batteries never leaked? There would be a million dead clocks.

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