Looking back

The more I write, the more I regret writing stuff in the past. Dear God, some of my old posts are so embarrassing that I regret having to follow my own blog (WordPress, by default makes you follow your own blog. Pretty deep, if you think about it). Having said that, those are the posts that got me here. I am pretty sure an older me will look back at this post and get embarrassed. That’s what life is. A series of looking back at the fuck-ups. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter where you look because there’s stars everywhere.

That last quote doesn’t make any sense, but I need to believe that I said something smart, so I am going to leave it there.


  1. Personally speaking I only get upset when someone betrays my trust, plays games with me, involves their network (including their partner, boss, colleagues and my colleagues and tutors) to impersonate and mock me with unfunny commentary lifting social media comments from my personal pages and also sends explicit images and words on the world wide web (in front of recruiters, my own partner and friends) Oh- and is rather cold with me in ‘real life’ when I reach out to them, telling me I should go to the police if I have a problem (whilst also sprouting on about humanity on the world wide web), never thanking me for my work for their company, or for donations, for volunteering, for going to universities to publicise their work or for writing a review for their work (and one who makes snide remarks on their own accounts). And finally – banning/avoiding me yet bizarrely keeping my name and pages under their name on the world wide web when we have no friendship.


  2. Oh sorry – should have added – having my linkedin profile with the words ‘revenge’ and ‘porn’ with images of women wearing a t-shirt with the slogan ‘ugly woman’. Such a mistake in my life to help a man in business with an act of kindness. Rant over.


  3. PS. If one is truly happy in their own life, they would not have to denigrate, slut shame, insult, put down, harass, ridicule, and add bitchy click bait under other people’s name for ‘satire’ and ‘science’. You mention in your previous post that the meaning of lyrics don’t matter but I disagree as one who had very derogatory lyrics under my name including Benee’s Supalonely’s lyrics ‘I know I fucked up, I’m just a loser’. But then you can’t talk to someone who admits on their own blog (and here’s one from the archives) ‘Usually the seed of an idea comes from my frequent and high-dosage sensations of jealousy, fear, anger and particularly, spite. That’s where it starts, and later, if I’m lucky, comes a slightly more healthy mix of constructive emotions.’ How that applies to me I do not know – never met since December 2014/not going to meet/don’t want to meet


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