The fear of the people

I’ve been contemplating doing stand-up comedy for a while now. I see all the specials on Netflix, and it gets me excited, but at the same time, I also come across the lesser known faces on Youtube get ripped apart for bad jokes. And then the hate comments. I get it. People come to see a good show, and if they don’t get one, they’ll rip you apart. I’ve seen really good comics do really bad shows and get booed. The crowd’s a harsh teacher. I get the whole “necessary evil” thing, but sometimes I wonder what happens to those comics who get beat down, never to get back up again.

I understand it’s a learning process. Once you gain the ability to steer the crowd in the way you want them to go, it’s like weilding a superpower. It feels great. The crowd’s in on the joke, they are with you all along the way, waiting for the punchline, and when you finally deliver it, they erupt in laughter. It’ the greatest feeling in the world, to make people laugh. 

I tried to do it once. It went ok, and by “ok” I mean there was no booing. Oh! I missed one small detail. No one laughed, They just kept staring at me, waiting for a punchline. The only problem was, I didn’t have one. The only thing I had with me was some loose change, and sweat. But I kept looking at the girl’s faces, because, you know, women are generally more supportive about this type of thing, plus I was very single. But even they didn’t have anything for me. So I cut the crap, did some investigation. 

Why am I funny in general, but a failure when I’m on stage? It has to be the fear, but then I trained myself out of the fear, and it still didn’t work. There was something limiting my ability to convey the humour. I wasn’t able to take the audience on a journey with me. Then it hit me. I am an introvert. My thought process is not then same in front of a crowd. That’s different from fear. It’s just that, the energy level is different. When I’m out with a friend or two, I don’t care where the conversation goes. I don’t filter out the religious, or sexual stuff from the my day-to-day experiences. Most importantly, I don’t try to be funny.  

Fuck this. People scare me, but I’ll keep coming back, punch-line or not.

3 comments

    1. Listen, I don’t know you, but you made me very very happy with that comment. So what I’m going to do is, I’m going to grant you one wish, just one. Actually no, no wishes. I’m broke. You can be my friend though.

      Liked by 1 person

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